Birth Stories

Home birth photographer in the Triad Area

One Greensboro, North Carolina Home Birth Photographer’s home birth experience.

Homebirth, on purpose!

I can’t think of a better way for my family to have celebrated the New Year than by welcoming our fourth child! If you’ve ever been pregnant, you know how heavy the waiting gets for those last few weeks, and I was definitely feeling ready to meet my baby, especially after such a busy fall season full of weddings and family sessions. Thankfully I had been able to wrap up all of my editing just after Christmas, but I had scheduled a newborn session for the morning of January 2 that I felt a little anxious about. Was I really going to photograph a session after my due date had passed? What if my water broke at my client’s house?!? I would be mortified. But my midwife had assured me that if I was feeling good and not having much warmup, it would be perfectly fine to go through with the session, and I knew I would feel more at peace if I was able to get it done myself instead of hiring an associate to do it for me. Besides, my first three babies were late – 11, 8, and 5 days, respectively – so I figured I had at least a couple of days after my due date to get some last minute things done. 

False labor?

For the month of December, my husband and I had been watching the show “Bones” after the big kids went to bed. New Year’s Eve was no different, until about 11:30pm when we decided to shut down for the night and I noticed some light cramping. I figured I was experiencing more Braxton Hicks contractions and went to use the bathroom before tucking in. When you’re pregnant, you get in the habit of checking the paper every time juuuust in case. To my surprise, I saw blood! Not a large amount but enough to get my attention. Knowing this could be an indication of very early labor, I called to update my midwife and was encouraged to get some sleep and call back if I began to feel anything serious happening. My second and third labors were very fast at only about three hours each, so I was a little on edge hoping that if I did need to call my midwife she’d arrive in time to catch my baby! 

I was a little surprised and maybe a smidge disappointed to wake up still pregnant. Contractions were mild and manageable, but I still wanted to take the day slowly and rest as much as possible. To be safe, I contacted my newborn session client and let her know I was probably in labor and we’d need to reschedule.

Why homebirth?

My first baby would have likely been a marathon labor, like so many others, but after the first 24 hours I was exhausted in every sense of the word. We ended up transferring from the birth center to the hospital where I was given an epidural and pitocin. I received care at a different birth center in my second pregnancy, and delivered there as planned. Unlike with my first baby, I barely had enough time to process being in labor before my second was born. I went from no contractions to water breaking to holding my son within three hours! That’s the reason I chose to have my third baby at home. Homebirth felt like a safer option than having to pull over and deliver in the car. And sure enough, my third baby was a successful and speedy homebirth!

Every pregnant mom thinks through what her labor might be like, but we never really know what we’re gonna get until we’re in the thick of it. I felt comfortable with speedy deliveries, but despite having book knowledge of the physiological processes of typical labor, I never really had the firsthand experience. I spent much of my fourth pregnancy telling myself labor would be long so I could feel more mentally prepared. Knowing this was likely to be my last baby, I prayed for courage to get through a long labor safely. Throughout New Year’s Day I carried on as usual with laundry and snacks for the big kids. I even baked muffins while my dad and husband worked on hanging siding on our new-ish garage. My daughter, our former youngest, asked to play with the new Connect 4 game she got for Christmas (and of course I let her win). All the while I felt small surges as my uterus slowly worked on bringing my baby down. 

Most of the contractions were mild and didn’t require much attention. I began to feel a bit discouraged waiting for things to pick up. Maybe this was just prodromal labor? Was I going to be pregnant for two more weeks? I tried not to let fear creep in and prayed for God to ease my desire to be in control. 

The excitement begins!

I didn’t eat much that day but since I knew I would need something to give me energy during the harder parts of the day, I started prepping chicken for a simple soup (3pm). Just as the water began to boil I felt a stronger contraction coming on and had to lean over the counter to control my breathing. When the surge reached the peak, I felt the gush of my waters breaking! I immediately waddled to the bathroom to check the fluid for abnormality and called my midwife.

My second baby was born around two hours after my water broke, so I fully expected my labor to speed up. Since we hadn’t had a professional birth photographer for any of my previous births, I had asked my friend, Megan, to come over and photograph our last baby’s arrival at home. As a birth photographer, having photographs from my own home birth story was deeply important to me, and I knew I could trust my birth photographer, to arrive quickly and ready to go. I called her up and explained that while she shouldn’t rush, she should probably try to arrive within the hour. 

I tried to get my mind off my uterus by handling chicken chores with my boys and going on a short walk in the field behind our house (4pm). But I could tell my body wasn’t doing much. I had gone about thirty minutes without a single contraction before Megan arrived. 

My mom arrived with the traditional New Year’s Day dinner of ham, greens, and beans. While mom finished up the food, Megan and I chatted in the living room waiting for anything exciting to happen. I think I told Megan more than once that she could go home if she wanted, but like the good friend she is, she refused. While my dad and husband finished up the outside work, I got the kids started on showers.

At this point my mood had shifted from discouraged to defeated. This was uncharted territory for me, and I was beginning to think of all the what-ifs – what if I didn’t progress and we had to transfer or what if the midwife I worked with at the hospital wasn’t on call – and on and on. In an effort to calm my mind (and keep my family from picking up on my emotional turmoil), I sent myself to bed (5pm). The kids came in one by one to say goodnight and get a quick cuddle. As I held each of my children I felt my contractions growing stronger – confirmation that oxytocin, the “love hormone”, was doing its job! My husband sent the home birth photographer on her way to relax at home before begin called back to photograph my home birth. When contractions felt they were lasting about 45 seconds every 4-6 minutes, I called my home birth midwife around 6:45pm to let her know I thought it might be time to head over. She and her assistant arrived by 8:15pm and the work began! 

Relaxing during a home birth

With my middle two labors, surges were so strong and fast that I had to stay in bed to focus on relaxing my body entirely so my uterus could do the work. By the time I was ready to get in the tub I knew transition wasn’t far off and I’d be holding my baby soon! But there was zero pattern to my fourth labor and the only contraction that actually felt painful was the one that broke my water. I just wanted to get into a rhythm! As my midwife checked baby’s position and heartbeat she remarked that I was coping well with my contractions, since I was having one right then. I laughed – maybe my body was doing more than I thought and I just had a high pain tolerance… or maybe they weren’t that strong. 

My midwife suggested that I get my body moving to encourage baby to rotate and shift down. She guided me into lifted lunges and active squats and while I didn’t feel much more intensity from the contractions, my legs got a little tired. As I carried on through the stretches, the midwives organized all the supplies they would need for the birth. My husband and mom pulled out all of the pots and pans and began to boil water for when I would eventually get in the tub (our water heater doesn’t hold enough to fill our party sized tub!). 

Stop and Go

It felt like I was spinning in circles. The last thing I wanted was for this to be a really long warmup with no progress. I didn’t want the midwives to have to wait around doing nothing for hours and hours, and I definitely didn’t want them to have come for false labor! My midwife’s assistant offered me an herbal tincture to help strengthen my contractions. I’m not sure what was in it, but about a half hour later it seemed like things were progressing a bit.

The strangest thing about this labor was how easy it seemed. I was still laughing and talking with my husband, and I really did feel fine, aside from being worried about how everyone ELSE was feeling. It seemed wrong for me to feel so relaxed! If I could feel so calm and not be in pain, was this really labor? Did I call everyone here for nothing? 

At around 930pm the midwives suggested a cervical check to get a baseline – 4cm. They offered to head home so I could sleep and they would come back when I was closer to delivery. Thinking of the possibility of them not getting back in time made me feel panicky, especially since they were each an hour away. I did NOT want an unassisted birth! I countered by asking to lie down for an hour and see how I felt. If there was no change, they would head home. 

I slept hard for that hour with my husband snuggled behind me. The midwives may have come in to check baby’s heartbeat once, but I was focused on getting as much rest as possible. Soon the hour had passed and my contractions had finally settled into a rhythm. We continued with some side-lying releases – I laid on my side at the edge of the bed with my top leg hanging off over the bed – to give baby a little more space. These were SO painful, not because of the contractions, but because of the extreme symphysis pubis pain I had felt for most of my pregnancy. Crossing my knees was NOT comfortable at all! Not to mention the extra chub I’d developed on my thighs that made it a little tricky to get in position comfortably. One of my favorite moments was when I jokingly said I needed to move my leg fat out of the way to get comfy, and the midwife looked at me seriously and said “yes, the beautiful body that Italian artists have tried for hundreds of years to replicate but just can’t!”. I mean, being compared to an Italian artist’s muse while in labor was pretty empowering, ha!

For me, labor is all about keeping my energy stored up until the most difficult stage, transition. It really is a marathon. If you spend all your energy walking stairs, squatting, or MOVING, you might run out of steam before the pushing stage. That’s exactly what happened with my first baby and I knew I wanted to avoid feeling like that again. My husband made sure to keep me hydrated, and I made sure to sit and relax between each contraction. 

The biggest supporter

After we finished the side-lying releases, my midwife instructed me to have my husband lift and hold my belly for the duration of ten contractions. This would help take pressure off my back, open my pelvis, and make even more space for baby to come down. My husband wasn’t able to help me much during our last two births, not because he didn’t want to, but because I just needed a dark, quiet space to labor in. I am so grateful that he was able to be involved in this labor as much as he was. All of my favorite photos have him there, holding me or just being present for me. 

I began feeling more pressure in my back and decided to lay down again. I could tell I was getting close because I was getting uncomfortable in my clothes – IYKYK. I told my husband to start filling the tub and made my way into the bathroom. Our tub is enormous. We added the bathroom when I was pregnant with our third baby, and I knew I wanted a waterbirth at home, so we got the largest tub we could find! I settled into the deep water and tried to relax by resting my head on the side of the tub. Time seemed to stop for me in the tub and I must have been falling asleep between contractions. My husband said one of the midwives poured in a few kettles of hot water and he was afraid she was going to burn me – I have no memory of this!

I knew I was close when I needed to sit up and lean into my husband for support. I was feeling SO MUCH PRESSURE, but hadn’t yet felt the urge to push. Unless you’ve felt the fetal ejection reflex, it’s kind of hard to describe. I wanted to avoid rushing and tearing and knew I needed to wait for that feeling before beginning to push. Until this point I had been able to breathe through the surges without much noise, but the feeling of my baby descending into the birth canal required me to vocalize. The media tries to make it seem like giving birth is the most painful thing a woman can go through. Women are often depicted as out of control, screaming as loud as they can while bearing down to push. For me, keeping my voice low and maintaining control of my breathing helps me keep my body loose, so the vocalizations during my transition were more guttural, almost like a cross between a yell, a growl, and a sigh. Laboring women would make excellent metal band vocalists!

One thing I had missed out on during my previous births was feeling my baby’s head during crowning. Knowing I probably wouldn’t have another chance, I told my husband to remind me to do that during this birth. I was so proud of myself for not needing the reminder! Once I began to feel the burning of my baby’s head crowning, I reached down to feel a surprising amount of hair! I remember saying to my husband, “oh it burns, but the burning is good!” I wanted so badly to push, to finally meet my little baby, but I knew my body wasn’t ready just yet. I squeezed my husband’s arm and tried to center myself, breathing (but almost roaring) through the next few contractions. I grew uncomfortable in the squat position and leaned back into the tub to float just a bit before feeling the urge to push. With one hand I braced myself against the shower wall and gripped my husband’s arm with the other. Once I started pushing, I didn’t want to stop! I wanted to see and hold and kiss my baby! The head was born within two pushes and my midwife made sure to keep my pelvis in the water as she told me to slow down and take a break. Of course I didn’t listen, and pushed baby out with the last two contractions (2am)!

It’s a…

There isn’t anything more exciting than seeing your baby for the first time, except maybe finding out the gender after the birth! We’ve waited to find out for each of our four kids, and every time has been such a sweet surprise. This time, the umbilical cord was so short I couldn’t pull baby straight up to my chest. In the whirlwind of post-birth excitement I hadn’t even thought to check the gender until my photographer/friend, Megan, asked what we had. In truth, I desperately wanted a second daughter – I asked my husband to look in an attempt to soften the potential blow. Of course he insisted I look first. I gently lifted one tiny foot from my now empty belly and saw that our fourth baby was indeed a girl! I threw my head back, laughing and almost screaming with bliss to tell the rest of the room.

As my adrenaline filled body shook with laughter, my husband woke the big kids so they could meet their new baby sister. Their sleepy eyes were filled with a mix of curiosity and confusion as they peered into the tub to see the baby’s tiny hands and face. My oldest son said “she’s not like us, she’s PINK!”

After clamping the cord, we offered the big kids the opportunity to cut baby free. With a hint of disgust, they declined. My husband cut the cord and pulled baby up for skin to skin so I could deliver the placenta and get cleaned up before falling into bed. Other than a little tingling, I felt great!

My midwives stood me up and wrapped me in warm towels, then escorted me to the bed to snuggle my baby girl. She was unbelievably chunky, but petite, and had quite the cry! I had a feeling we would have our largest baby yet but she ended up being our smallest at 7lbs 3 oz. I held her close while the midwives checked our vitals, stroking her chubby cheeks and counting her little fat rolls – seven on each arm! Her head was covered in thick, dark hair that was curled all over, and she already had a little line of dark hairs over each eye – my older kids didn’t have eyebrows at birth. Her cheeks were so chubby her mouth looked permanently pinched! I kissed her tiny nose and breathed her in deep. 

My family watched as the midwives measured the baby and made sure she was healthy, her little cries filling the room, then we all piled into the bed to gaze at the baby and snuggle a little before sending the big kids back to their room to sleep. My mom made me a big plate of ham and eggs and my husband fed me while I got the baby latched while the midwives cleaned our bathroom, started a load of laundry, and filled out their paperwork. 

My husband and I held our new little girl, memorizing every inch of her soft, squishy body. I don’t remember falling asleep, but I woke up in a dark and quiet house, still holding my baby. No nurses came in to check my vitals. No alarm bells or footsteps in the hallway. The peace of it all filled me and I thanked God for allowing me to experience the joy of bringing new life into His world in the comfort of my home. 

Of my four births, my last home birth has been the longest and was absolutely my favorite. I was present through every stage – the anticipation, frustration, and unpredictability of early labor; the rolling waves of active labor; the intensity and hopelessness of transition; the ecstasy and empowerment of delivery. I wouldn’t change any of it. 

To view some of my Greensboro, NC birth story sessions and get all the details on my birth photography packages, view my Birth Photography page here.

_{Images captured by Megan Allred Photography and edited by Hayley Jayne Photo}